Sometimes people say funny shit.
Not so long ago it was International Booksellers Week (who knew?) – in celebration, independent booksellers from across the UK shared some of the best weird and wonderful comments they have overheard in their bookshops. Please read these gems:
SIMPLY BOOKS, Bramhill, Greater Manchester
Elderly chap came in on Saturday and asked whether we had one of Delia Smith’s books called Cooking for Sluts… didn’t bat an eyelid when I said the book I thought he was looking for was called How to Cheat at Cooking.
****
FALMOUTH BOOKSELLER, Falmouth, Cornwall
Customer: Have you got Lion al Ritchie’s Wardrobe?
(Same customer): Also, do you have the AA book of Milne?
****
RIPPING YARNS, London
Customer (to their friend): God, the Famous Five titles really were crap, weren’t they? Five Go Camping… Five Go Off in a Caravan… if it were Five Go Down to a Crack House it might be more exciting.
****
RIPPING YARNS, London
Customer: Do you have a copy of Jane Eyre?
Bookseller: Actually, I just sold that this morning, sorry!
Customer : Oh. Have you read it?
Bookseller: Yep, it’s one of my favourite books.
Customer: Oh great (sits down), could you tell me all about it? I have an essay to write on it by tomorrow.
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RIPPING YARNS, London
Customer: Do you have a book that lists aphrodisiacs? I’ve got a date on Friday
****
THE MAINSTREET TRADING COMPANY, St Boswells
Customer: I’d like a Where’s Wally book please.
Bookshop owner: Our system says we have one in stock, but I, ah, can’t find it!
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DEVIZES BOOKS, Devizes, Wiltshire
Bookseller: Do you need a bag for your books?
Customer: No, it’s OK, I have a cardigan.
****
These kind of make me want to work in a book shop.
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