Barbie: décor extravaganza

Just in case anyone out there forgot (oh the horror!) just WHY Barbie is do damn cool; check it out!

Now that you’re all ready to start fusing Barbie to any flat surface in your home (ceiling included), there are ten simple rules that must be followed to ensure Barbie’s ‘it’s cool to be kitsch’ street cred isn’t shed by poor decorating:

1. The naked-er the better!
2. Also, the pinker the better.
3. Décor Barbies must be blonde haired (pink streaks are acceptable) and white skinned (Cool and Kitsch do not consort with Politically Correct).
4. Hair (irrespective of length) must be teased, crimped or curled (a perm is ultra awesome).
5. Home hair-cut jobs up the ‘cool-kitsch’ factor, as do do-it-yourself tattoos.
6. The bling-er the better (Barbie loves to be glitz).
7. Garishly bright 80s-style eye-shadow is essential.
8. Never ever include Ken in any display – he and Barbie divorced years ago. They are no longer friends.
9. Only resort to blu-tack if your glue has run out and you have no usable wire lying around.
10. Barbie is a social creature, so try to hang her in clumps.

There you have it budding decorators. Now get to it!