The zombie apocalypse – right? You know the one. It happens seasonally in millions of homes across the globe, transporting viewers into a world asphyxiated by the fetid fumes of the living dead; a place where survival means RUN (fast)…also acquire a weapon that can carve through bone and brain and learn martial arts but mainly the first part.
Or else the zombies will get you.
And then you’ll be a zombie.
Which would suck.
The UK’s National Counter Terrorism Security Office (Nactso) also says RUN…then HIDE and TELL. And whatever you do, don’t play dead – like zombies, guns and bombs smell life.
If Sheikh Abu Muhammad al-Adnani rocks up at your party, the person you want to be friends with is the guy or gal who’s spent six seasons watching Rick Grimes and his guerilla posse evading death-by-mastication. This person would have located all the exits upon immediate entry into the building – any building. This person will know, when sitting in gridlock and the zombies are coming, whether to ramp the kerb and drive into oncoming traffic or lock the doors and duck for cover. This person will know where the best hiding place is and how to get there with a hoard of man-eaters licking at your heels. This person knows how to mask dread with determination.
This person has practised.
Call it indoctrination, instinct, obsession…all of the above – whatever; what matters is that this person will know how to escape.
Contemplating near and certain death within the safety of a fantasy apocalypse (as Walking Dead fans do when stuck in a queue or waiting for dinner service) allows for the mind to go where it needs to without the confusion of panic to debilitate chances of survival so that when there is real reason to panic, like Pavlov’s dog; the brain has been conditioned to deal.
As long as Rick Grimes is alive and engaged in Zombie Evasion 101, Sheikh Abu had better watch the shit out.